a swedish tale
11 september 2002

a change of scenery is always welcome, especially during the facade of summer in amsterdam. although august was fairly seasonal, we took advantage of our friends tying the knot in sweden to make a holiday out of it. we also wanted to celebrate seven years of being together by doing something special. gary was working in helsinki so he ended up sailing over- 15 hours on a giant cruise ship with a giant duty free shopping mall. i opted for the 2 hour flight and since i'm not a fan of travelling by boat, i didn't feel that i missed out too much {except the shopping, of course}. there's something romantic about reuniting with your partner in another country, maybe because it often happens in movieland. that was a pleasant way to start our journey. the weather was perfect and would remain so for the whole trip. lucky us. we headed out in our rental car, which we affectionately named, "the nissan behemoth". we had reserved a small car but were upgraded when we picked it up. we did have a lot of luggage so we didn't mind too much and being out of amsterdam offers one to be a bit more greedy with personal space anyway.

our destination was mariefred, a small town surrounded by lake malaren and gripsolms castle, only about 70 kilometers from stockholm. upon first glance, it was obvious why our nuptial friends had chosen it. aside from the fact that the groom's parents live closeby {he's swedish}, it is the perfect setting: picturesque, rustic, surrounded by nature. sounds like some places we know and miss in colorado. as we were wandering over to our bed and breakfast, we were immediately sidetracked into one of those inviting shops that sell lovely things for the decorating project that is now omnipresent in our world of homeowning. it didn't take long to find some pillows for the window bench and a few other bits and bobs. as i said, that was before we even dropped off our luggage. fortunately, it was the only shop like that in the tiny town so all the damage was done in one trip. our hostess was a lovely woman, living alone with 2 precious cats {aren't they all?} in a charming house with lots of light and an apple tree in her backyard. we enjoyed chatting with her, and as gary relaxed and read, i toured the village with my camera ready, taking in the serenity inherent in walking and discovering the sights of a new place. the focal point is the castle, which boasts 4 towers over some sprawling acreage inundated with gardens and a continual view of the lake. the late afternoon sun revived my faith in the power of a summer day. i sat in the gardens for quite awhile reading my "O" {oprah} magazine. one of the simple joys of life.

we soon learned that mariefred is not a culinary mecca; in fact there only seemed to be one option for a decent meal. it was adequate and so were the mosquitos, making it impossible to linger too long. the town buzzes during the day but closes down fairly early so we did too. the following day, we headed to the church so that gary could practice. he was playing for the wedding and had not had access to a piano so it was time to get serious. he's pretty talented so it didn't take him long to whip the three pieces into shape after he convinced the caretaker church lady that he had permission to be there. i amused myself by strolling around. later we drove a short distance to the campground and rented a canoe. this is something that really put a smile on my face, as it reminded me of my days in summer camp, which i dearly loved throughout my childhood and teenage years. i know, i know, i hate boats but not all boats. in fact, i LOVE canoeing and after getting over the near hernia from lifting the thing into the water, it was as calming as i remember it. of course in those days, we never had to lift the boat, we always dragged it and it was anything but calm, trying to impress boys while going down the mighty rapids of the delaware river. so a few years have passed and the emphasis is a bit different but the tremendous feeling of being out on a lake in sweden with my honey is about as perfect as it gets. we paddled over to a mountainside for awhile, munching on some grapes while looking at the sky. these kinds of experiences make me want to have a getaway cottage somewhere in the country where we can find retreat when city life becomes too crazy. i cling to the fantasy of having the best of both. that night we took no chances on dinner in mariefred and drove on to the next, slightly larger town of strangnas. here we were able to dine on mexican fajitas in sweden, which were surprisingly tasty, and afterwards wandered into a coffee shop {not the kind we have in a'dam} but the kind with the comfy sofas. glad to know those exist outside of the states. they are always great for people watching and our attention turned to a group of teenage boys with mophead hairdos and long sideburns. the beatles live, obviously spreading their influence to a whole new generation.

the wedding of lesley and jorgen pleasantly dominated our activities for the next few days. we of course were required to attend the rehearsal on friday morning as gary was participating in the service. i was given the important task of turning pages for him at the piano. the vicar was a lovely woman named sonja and made every one feel very comfortable. she expressed some angst over her command of english but it was actually quite perfect and she was definitely an old pro at this, apparent when she advised the bride how to kneel so that her dress wouldn't rip. we remarked that a male priest never would have thought of that. gary played the processional and the recessional but was saving the romantic brahms piece he had chosen for them as a surprise for the real event.

let the festivities commence. most of the guests had already arrived in town and all the ladies were invited to a special lunch in order to wish lesley farewell to singledom. {that's how it read on the invitation}. off we went in a caravan to a nearby castle called taxinge. our table was amid the setting of this handsome building from another century, protected by a canopy with a grand view of the manicured lawns and the sparkling lake. i thanked the sun gods for smiling on us and allowing me to wear a summer dress, which is not usually an option in holland. it was refreshing to be surrounded by all that female energy, not to mention the traditional swedish fare that was almost too pretty to eat. it was a design of layered seafood interwoven with bread and mayo and colorful herbs and served with some crisp white wine. it was a real treat to be among these ladies, many of whom i felt i had known for a long time and we lingered there for most of the afternoon chatting away and bonding. the castle is apparently famous for its great desserts and in fact, there was an entire room filled with them. we each had to walk through and choose one and believe me, it wasn't easy. in the end i was happy with my pistachio mint something or other. we ended the party by driving back into town and taking a sunset swim in the lake. it was a grand prelude to the big day.

the wedding was everything we might have expected and more, and it was great fun to be amongst the english ladies, all wearing hats. i wore one as well and decided from now on this must be standard attire for attending weddings. the ceremony was simple and poignant, sonja's meaningful words echoing through the church and gary's romantically lush piece filling our eyes with tears. unfortunately there were some small children causing serious distraction and i just wonder what makes parents think it's ok to bring two and three year olds to church. maybe they are immune to those bubbling sounds made by the cuties at home but should take a moment to realize that the rest of us are not. enough said on that subject. aside from that, the bride and groom were a gorgeous vision of elegance without going overboard on the fairy princess ideal. lesley donned a silvery gray dress, with a high collared beaded jacket and jorgs was dapper in his boxy suit, accented with a gray tie. after the service we walked en masse to the castle, which was indeed the storybook kind, where the entire entourage was entertained by some 18th century musicians and baroque dancers. more mingling and champagne drinking continued back at the hotel while waiting to be ushered into a softly lit room for dinner, the air of romance pervaded with details such as rose petals sprinkled on the tables. it was a great feast and a couple of highlights stand out. our table was all couples except for a large man who was seated next to sonja {the vicar}. he managed to get her to kiss him as he went around the table taking photos of each couple kissing. when he got to her, she just went for it, surprising all of us and after composing ourselves, we asked them to repeat it for the camera, which they happily did. later they were seen dancing together.....another great moment occurred after the wine had been flowing generously. everyone was handed a sheet of lyrics to an abba song called "ring, ring, ring" in swedish. apparently the groom prides himself on knowing all the lyrics to all the abba songs in swedish and he had every intention of showing off this skill at his wedding. when in rome....swedish tradition calls for anyone who wants to to make a speech. not just a toast but a speech. the words that stick with me are from the bride's- she said she loves her life with jorgs because "it's fun and it's real", and this really touched me.

we gathered once more on sunday morning for brunch and many of the colorful personalities showed up. afterwards, we went our separate ways. gary and i took a tour of the castle, which has some very interesting history and also some of its original 16th century details in tact. it is also a great portrait gallery with over 600 paintings displayed of famous swedes through the centuries, ingrid bergman and jenny lind among them. our favorite was the theatre built by gustav III, influenced by the french court dramas and our guide told us he created a scandal by performing in his own plays and then attending dinner in the palace in his costume. serious faux pas. we were also able to see the technical workings backstage and how the scene changes were made. lots of wood; hopefully the "no smoking" ordinance would have been enforced in those days. the lazy afternoon drifted by as i challenged gary to a game of putt putt. the course was tended by some young swedish girls, who were taking their responisibilities quite seriously. they spent some time rattling off the rules and i don't think they realized that we couldn't understand a word of what they were explaining. let me just say this- it was the worst game of mini golf i've every played! too many slopey holes, which i learned is not my forte. we stopped keeping score after too many frustrating strokes.

we were now staying at the red cross hotel, simple and clean and situated next to the lake with a walking trail behind it. once again i was reminded of camp as the buildings were barn like structures made of richly painted red wood and the "mess hall" was big enough to accomodate a small army. it smelled great- the air so clean and woodsy. i need that nature fix every once in awhile, which is why we chose not to stay in stockholm. as dusk approached on sunday, we went walking on the trail around the lake, only to intrude on a herd of white tail deer grazing in the field adjacent to the trail. i had a slight panic attack because we were so close to them and i really felt like we were in their space and maybe they would charge. but gary reminded me they were bambis, not rhinos in africa so i was able to carry on gracefully. wow- my perspective has really shifted; i think i've been away from colorado for too long. my ego barely lets me admit this but looking back, it's a pretty good laugh.

since we were so close to stockholm, we thought it would be nice to experience a day in the city. besides, everyone said, "you have to see the old town". so we did. we had a wonderful day taking in the beautiful architecture flanked by water. the city is a series of islands connected by impressive looking bridges, with massive cruise ships visible in the downtown harbor. a few months ago, stockholm celebrated its 750 year anniversary; gary happened to be working there and got to see the tall ships in addition to the "love boat" sort. the shopping was really fun that day, probably because we happened to find a store that sold housewares AND clothing. bingo. we bought some colorful things for the kitchen- great quality, great prices and then i made the mistake of going upstairs to browse at clothing. everything i tried on was perfect. this never happens! but it was happening and i had to go with it, especially since i now invest in sweaters having to wear them most of the year. nothing like a successful shopping spree to perk up the appetite. we had a delicious lunch, grateful for the change from small town food to really good city food. the weather was fine for walking so we continued and by chance came upon the dans museet {dance museum}. the exhibit was an interesting mix of costumes for ritual dance from asia and africa and video clips of classical ballet and costumes from some of the great romantic ballets. the highlight was seeing some original leon bakst designs, which i've seen many times in books but now they were directly in front of me. he did the costumes for diagalev's ballet russe in the early 20th century and used lots of texture, color, and interesting patterns in his work. we stayed in the city, driving over to sodermalm, a trendy section of town and had a very hearty vegetarian dinner before heading back to our idyllic lodging.

as with all good trips, they are too short. we did fit in one more brisk walk around the lake before heading out to the airport. gary would then take the boat back to helsinki and i would fly away back to the land of rain. i actually can't complain as we've had some fantastic weather for most of this week. it's raining now and i think fall is upon us but we don't mind because we have our beautiful piano, and our cozy house and are waiting for our friends {the ones who got married} to come over for dinner. the dutch have a word to describe this fuzzy warm feeling- gezellig!!

happy autumn and i wish everyone a day of remembrance today and positive thoughts for the future.

with love,

deb